sheepdog pup training the trainer... as told by the pup

First, be prepared to feel a lot of pulling on your neck. For some reason these stupid people can't understand that when you see the sheep, the animals you were born with dominion over, you simply need to get as close as you can as fast as you can. It isn't anything personal. You aren't being bad- but these humans just don't get it. They demand that you stop pulling and maybe even stay behind them (what the HECK is THAT about anyway?) All other times you can bound ahead, and pull as hard as you want.

So, okay, you finally acquiesce to their need to be in front. Fine, if that's how they need it to be, just go along. It will get you to the sheep faster.

Finally, you "follow" the human into this place where the sheep are. Thank GOD. FINALLY. You know what to do, so you are ready. You try and try to get to those sheep, but AGAIN with the pulling- What IS IT with this pulling? Have these humans NEVER learned how to use a leash?

At some point, you see another person in with the sheep. Oh GREAT. Another bossy human. I wish they would just let me work. Ho hum. Anyway, so the lady who feeds me, and pets me finally lets the leash drop. Could it be? Am I free? ZOINKS!!!!!!!!! Sheep, HERE I COME!!!!!!

BOOM!!! What the HECK was that? That other human just hit the ground in front of me. Okay, better change direction quick. Done. BOOM! AGAIN with the stick. What is their problem? This is getting old. Hmmmm. What if I make a quick grab at those elusive buggers- HA! got 'em!!! BOOOM BOOOM comes that stick. Now I am very confused. Maybe I will eat some of those lovely raisinets I see everywhere. Mmm... they are good.. What? what's that? You are calling me over? Are you gonna let me near the sheep this time, or are ya gonna whack that darn stick in front of me?

Oh, okay, one more try, but you other human better be nice this time. This time I go in a bit more carefully, and that other human lets me circle the sheep... Hmmm. Maybe that's what they want? Okay, so, I am being real good. I haven't heard the BOOM in a long time, but MAN this is boring...

So, I run up, right into the faces of those sheep. I am just sick of seeing their butts. Hmmm, they don't run... That's weird. Maybe I ought to give them just a little room to move... There, that's it. Soon, the other human is walking backward through this pen we are in. I see that the objective is to get this human to change directions as many times as possible in the shortest amount of time. I learned that if the sheep start to run by that other human, she will change direction, and that means I get to get closer to the heads of those sheep!!! So, my goal now is to push push push those sheep. Always making that other human move around. Sometimes they even fall, and THEN it is HEAVEN. Sheep go running everywhere, and I can work, unencumbered by that stick.

Finally, she makes me stop. But HA! she has to catch me first. This is where it's really fun. I learned that if I lay down nicely, she will come walking up to me. When she is almost in reach, I take off, and she can't catch me!!!! It is way more fun without her, so I practice this evasive measure every day.

I suppose I have come a long way, being that I am only 10 months, but I still don't understand why the human has to always be in my way....