Well, I am at a loss. My old boy Tucker has become pretty incontinent lately. I don't think he knows he is going. He is also very weak behind. I think his time is coming. This is very hard for me. He still has a tail wag for me, and is still engaged in life, to some degree, but I know it's coming. How do I know when? I am making some changes in his care that ought to help with his bladder issues, but other than that, I just don't know. It weighs on me heavily.
Border Collie people who read my blog will probably recognize the name Jon Katz, and have formed your own opinions of him. I won't go into mine, but I wanted to mention that in a recent post in his blog, he mentioned that he no longer has his sheep. He also later, in another posts mentions that he wonders where he will be living in the future. At first it shocked me. Poor misguided (well, unguided) Rose. The Border Collie who was the resident sheepdog is now out of a job. I thought how horrendous for her. Then, I began to think about my own situation, and how tenuous it is with regard to being able to work sheep. It could end for myriad reasons at any time. There is nothing shocking about it. So, I may follow Mr. Katz to see how Rose holds up to this change.
As I ruminated about not working my dogs, I realized that they would be fine if I didn't work them. Lucy lives to work sheep- when sheep are there. But, if they are not there, she just lives to be with, and do things with me. Danny too. Danny truly loves the ball right now, and he is the same way with sheep as Lucy, but he would certainly survive, without sheep in his life. We all would. It's taken me a long time to realize this, but I am getting, in my heart, comfortable with the notion that if we could not work sheep anymore, we would survive, maybe even thrive. Of course that means finding another hobby, and we have been offered a slot in a dog "act" consisting of agility/Frisbee, and what have you, that travels all over. That may be an option.
I don't miss agility, so it won't be that. It would have to be disc dog, with a wee bit of agility mixed in. No, no flyball for Danny, as it is one of the most annoying sports to me. I can't stand the barking, and insanity of the dogs. Whatever the dogs and I do will be fun first, that is just the way it will be.
I feel sort of free now. Free from my self imposed jail of everything surrounds sheep work. It's sort of like over load. I just need to release that pent up anxiety of looking for my next "fix" and just live my life for God sake.
So, now that I have had my catharsis...
Friday is the trial, and I believe we are 4th again- same as last year. That is just weird. Last year not so good. Uh oh.
Lucy was lame yesterday after playing Frisbee- that cut on her foot is bothering her. So, this morning we took it real easy, and I only threw a few times for her. Danny got lots more ball throwing in. His endurance and heat tolerance is much better, so I am pleased about that.
I am so tired today, just knackered. I may just pass out when I get home.