Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Getting back into the groove

So, I am going to "Make this Blog Great Again" ;)  Well, I will at the very least try and post more than once every couple of years, maybe several times in two years...


So, life is good for me.  The Sheep are doing well.  I brought out a bale of hay to them two days ago, since they had moved in to the close field, from the outer field... this is their way of saying that there is no more feed for them out there.  So, anyway, I brought a bale out to them, and they seemed interested... Now, they are all fat, except the ram- he's a bit thin. 

Yesterday, when I got there, there was not a scrap of hay left, nothing.  I could not have vacuumed and seen it any cleaner.  Oh well, that right there tells me they are hungry.  So, I brought out a bale yesterday, this one was larger, and had more alfalfa in it.  The ram was not dog broke, so Joe had to do this.  Joe is such a sweet dog.  He does not want to bite, but he will if he must.  So I had to gee him on a bit-- and then the ram came at him, and that's when he nipped him.  Now the ram realizes Joe is not to be ignored.  Joe LOVES this.  It is absolutely the most rewarding thing to him- to feel useful to me, and to get real work done.  So, now for the next several months I will be feeding Sheep.  Joy.  Whatever, it is what you gotta do.  I do love my Sheep.  No, not in a lovey dovey way, but in a shepherd's way.  I love to take care of animals.  It is what I was born to do.  And,  Sheep really require very little in return- other than some feed and freedom to move around.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Faceboob (spelling error on purpose)

Facebook. The debil (my attempt at country slang), the ruination of society.  I will preface this by saying that Faebook can in fact be a good platform to 1) Advertise what you are selling and 2) To keep in touch with far away contacts.   Other than those two things, Faceboob is an absolute time waster, and keeps you from living your real life.  Is real life boring to you?  Then change what you are doing.  Do you feel like you are living through others by reading their exciting posts?  Then, get off the sofa, and start living your life, because before you know it, you won't be able to 1) Afford to live and 2) Actually enjoy it.

Here is a good way to discern if Facebook is the debil to you:


1) You post a photo of yourself and memorize the number of likes.

2) You post passive aggressive memes so that that special someone will see it.

3) The first and last thing you do in the day, the moment you can get on the internet, is to see what everyone ELSE is doing.

4) You take time away from real people to be on Facebook-- scroll through while at dinner, or family gatherings.

5) You believe that attention to your photographs is meaningful, that the like is for the whole you.  It is not; that like is for your physical attributes only.  This is all well and good, but it's a cheap attention, and cheap ain't what matters in life.

6) You have real life conversations on what was said on Facebook.



If all of these apply to you, at least at times, you need to step back and start living your life.  I call it Faceboob, because it does reduce our intelligence, it really, really does.  I am guilty of most of those things...  I have taken steps to walk away...  Here is what I do.

1) Remind myself daily that Facebook is NOT real.  Messages through Facebook are simple, and cheap ways to maintain connection to people without working for it.  If you want what's real, you gotta be willing to shut the phone off and get it.

2) Understand that most people are on there to advertise themselves in some way.  Not all advertisement is bad; especially if it is quality.  But, those who put up photos designed to get cheap attention, will in fact, get cheap attention, and then be sad when that is what they got.  Demand respect, do not ask for attention.  Girls, seriously, you can do far better than having someone "like" your scantily clad photo on line.  Please, have some self respect.  And guys, just be men.  Share your lives, no need for more.  I won't go further than that ;)

3) The biggest thing for me, was to delve so far down into Faceboob, that I lost all sense of who I was.  And I had to go searching for help to identify who I truly was.  Now, the people I admire more than anyone, are the ones who are rarely on Faceboob; for they have mastered life... Faceboob is simply a diversion from real life.  Don't miss your life for a like on the fake Faceboob.  Please don't.

Live your life like it's the only one you've got, don't miss a thing!!!


Monday, November 20, 2017

Losing myself..........

Hi everyone... Yes, almost TWO years since my last blog post... The only reason I can come up with is I have spent the last two years basically "finding" myself.  You see... most of my life has been spent trying to please others, not complain, or rock the boat.  This has caused a lot of people to see me as weak, and rightly so, and it then caused me to accept being treated as "less than".  Well, finally, after a very scary medical dodged bullet, losing people that mattered a lot to me suddenly without warning, and a new found desire to get healthy myself, I started to find myself needing clarity in that one piece that absolutely was swept under the rug--- my psyche.  Who the heck is Julie?

I no longer enjoyed the sheepdog trials at all.  I did not want to be with people that were not genuinely "nice" and friendly (for every one friendly person, there were 99 not), and I did not want to, CERTAINLY spend money on these people (in the form of trial fees etc.)  Okay, so no more trialing, other than a few close by trials.

Then, I started to travel.  That is when the dam broke.  That is when I truly lost my keel, and had no navigation, other than to do more traveling.  So I did.  And I realized this life ain't about anything other than my happiness, and peace.  Along with that comes the well being of my true friends, and family, but at this point, it was JUST about me, for once.  It had NEVER been about me...

So, I went to Montana in 2016, and then later in 2016, I went to England.  It was great, but it started the "I am absolutely not happy with my life" diatribe...  So, in 2017, I cut back my sheep to almost nothing, moved dogs on, got rid of a bunch of stuff in my house.  Just got rid of it all. I wanted nothing to keep me where I was.

And then, in 2017 I really started traveling- for real.  I was either away, or just back, or getting ready to leave.  I never put my suitcase away.  I would check the sheep, and leave.  I was fully checked out of my life at home.  Done, gone.  It is what I thought I wanted- to be rid of this prison of a defunct life.

And then, on my last trip... I started to long for home again.  True home, where there is peace.  All this traveling and not a lick of peace...

So, as I sat home, with my Meow by my side, and Joe lying at my feet.  I had a very faint wave of "it will be okay now Julie, you are home" come over me.  It was almost imperceptible.. but it was there.  I was finally feeling at home with me.  That is huge.

There is now a whole other bucket of emotions that have cropped up, but that is normal when you go through growth that I have.  It is so much easier to shut emotions down, to  never get happy, or sad, but that ain't living.  It is existing.   I won't exist anymore; in for a penny, in for a pound as they say.

So, going forward, seeing life through new spectacles, I can say this:  The only things I will engage in will be those that feed my soul, and heart.  I will no longer do all the giving, and not receive anything, because I am too busy giving.  If someone treats me badly, I will call them on it. I will be a door mat no longer. I will own who I am.

I am still doing the Sheep (thank goodness), and will always have my Border Collie(s).  But basically, the rest is simply up to the soulful Gods that I chose to follow.  If it ain't bringing you up, it's bringing you down.  I want to smile every single day, and that means choosing my friends, and how I spend my time wisely. 


I think it is very true that sometimes, we truly need to get lost, in order to find our way home. 

Blessings to you all.